Thursday, January 3, 2013
Monster Mom =(
It's been two years and three months since I became a parent. I thought I would already know better by this time but I still often find myself sulking in one corner with regrets of what I did or did not do. Sometimes I honestly think that I'm not fit to become a mother :(
Zoe is at her trying two's and it's been a crazy ride. A lot of people commend me on how behaved she is whenever we go out. Yes, at her age, I definitely have a lot of things to be proud of but I think that it is with that fact that I have also come to raise my expectations from her. Expectations that are sometimes too high for a kid of her age.
Earlier I had another temper blow out with her and I was so frustrated over something that was actually petty. She got terrified of me but instead of moving away from me, she just cried on my shoulders. What kind of a monster have I become? And while I was preparing for work, she tried to make it up to me by being sweet. She even complimented me while I was putting my pants on and said 'Wow, Mommy, ganda ganda.' and helped me put my belt on. It just crushed my heart that even when I showed immaturity and pointless anger at her earlier, she still found it in her young heart to make ammends and make me happy. What have I ever done in my life to deserve this sweet little girl?
And so I went to work with a heavy heart full of guilt over what I did today. I pray that God may give me more patience and wisdom to be the parent that I should be.
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Awww. Sweet kid. That's ok, it happens, bawi na lang next time.
ReplyDeleteAww Miss Manila-Dy. Don't fret. Everyone makes mistakes, even mommies. I think your sweet little girls understands that you love her very much and that you just couldn't control your temper that time. :)
ReplyDeleteMiss Manila-Dy, I think it's ok. You're not alone. I don't have kids yet but I sometimes can't reign in my temper with my hyperactive niece, too.
ReplyDeleteI have days like that too Van. Nakaka guilty talaga noh? I think part of this is because of work, we're tired, yung mga ganun. I pray we'll have more patience. Ngayong week grumpy din ako kay Amber.
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